Books written for girls

You know the hardest moments?

It's when your life feels a movie

And you see frames.

It's just a bit hazy

Right there.

And you're a witness to it

From the outside.

You blink

but your eyes keep burning.

You struggle

to get nowhere.

You listen

to the chatter around

to his smile, and her laugh lines.

You're not a part of this world.

This time

and space

don't belong to you.

Or don't you?

Your guiding star

Is in some corner of the world

Making memories

of their own.

The pictures don't include you.

Yet.

Stuck

In a haze

A stormy haze

I'll be round

I'll be loving you

Always..

Always

Here I am

I'll take my time

Here I am

I'll wait in line

Always..

Always

1984

So my parents complete 25 years of their marriage in a week. I've been sifting through their photographs, trying to freeze them in time. An attempt to show them what it was worth all this while.

There was one I found, where the four of us are in Simla, and I come up to my father's waist. So I must be, like, three feet tall. Another one of those time does fly moments. But this one is different. Cause it concerns two people who've been my foundation, my everything. Just thinking about it nowadays makes my eyes well up. Like right now.

It's like what someone once said..

"If after 25 years of marriage, I was even half as happy as you both, I'd consider myself lucky."

Above the orange

I was swinging.

Swinging high enough

For my toes to tickle

The sky.

I threw my head back

And the world

Turned upside down.

The stars shone,

The inky sky interspersed

With their

Intermittent twinkling.

I followed one

Through the vacillations,

When I heard

A nine-year old's mind.

The star was her grandfather.

He watched over her.

I looked at her

For one whole minute

And agreed

With all my heart.

The inkiness

Of the sky

Transcended its borders

At that moment,

My smile lost in it.

Some moments like..

A bass note.

A drop of rain.

Her smell.

Bark of laughter.

A cool breeze.

Comic strips.

An old friend.

Not getting the joke.

Smiles.

Chatting with Maa.

Tanned feet.

Chocolate.

Sudden inspirations.

Obsessing.

A moment of oneness.

With this universe.

"Just say you'll wait.. You'll wait for me."

Diary #2

I'm frozen

In this time and space

Vacant eyes

Seeking the touch

Of your lips

When they're half-closed

Fingers wanting

The smell

Of your hair

On them again

And my being

Anything but one

Everything but one

A lone light bulb

Struggles to fill

This night's silence

Its yellow

Illuminating smiles

The ones we captured

In pictures

Pictures of happy times

Pictured of times

Together

I'm frozen

In this time and space

To blink

Would want life.